Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Normal?

New normal.

That's been my mantra for the past 2 years. As we all have been adjusting to illness, separation, divorce...let's figure out how to do life in our "new normal". Have to tell you that just when you think you know what your normal is - it changes again. When I first became sick, I begged God to heal me. When healing did not come I begged to have joy in my new normal. He was faithful to bring me joy.

Normal changed again when Don left.

Ok God, now what? We'll be separated for awhile, we will all get the help we need and you will heal our family. Right? Isn't that what you are going to do Lord? Well, I can live with that. This will be my new normal until our family is whole again.

Normal changed again when divorce papers were served.

Are you kidding me, Lord? You aren't really going to let this happen, are you? Well...I guess so. Alright then, we'll learn to live in this new normal. Kids devastated, I've lost the one I walked through the last 18 years with, alone with my illness and yet...JOY. No, not happy! JOY.

God never promised us normal. He never promised us an easy life. But He did promise that He will never leave us. He does promise that He will walk each step of the way with us. There are so many of you going through things that are unthinkable to me. Life is hard! But there can be JOY in the midst of it. Look for it. It's there. Do not miss the blessings in the midst of your pain.

I would not trade the past 24 months for anything!! Inexpressible pain and heartache? Yes. But knowing Jesus like I do now makes it all worth while. Still praying for complete healing of my body and my family. Praying that God will work in the lives of David and Ellie in miraculous ways. It's hard when your life circumstances affect those you love the most. But I know that God will be faithful to them. I have to trust them to Him.

May this family never take "normal" for granted again. Lord, use us in the lives of others. Bring healing. And thank you for Your Joy in every "new normal" that we walk through.


33 comments:

christy rose said...

Lord, thank you for joy in every new normal that I encounter.
Amen
That is an excellent prayer!

Thank you for that.

Laura said...

What a great post.
Our new " normal" keeps changing doesn't it, my friend. But I thank the LORD that he never does leave us.
And I will say it again I am so honored to have you apart in my life in this wild and crazy journey.
Love ya,
Laura

Teresa @ Grammy Girlfriend said...

Great post...we are all on a jouney with lots of new normals....whatever normal is..

Kiesha said...

Your such an inspiration to me.
I have learned that there is no set normal for any one person and that normal does change.
Right now I'm enjoying the normal that I didn't have as a child and the normal I took for granted until I got sick.
Email Soon
Love and Hugs
Kiesha

Leslie said...

My friend, Wendi, has talked about her "new normal" ever since her husband was diagnosed with colon cancer. It's not what you expected or perhaps even wanted, but it's what God has given you. You can choose to either find pain or joy in it. She and her husband have chosen to find joy, and I'm so glad you have too!

beyond this moment said...

Thanks for this. I've been wallowing over all the new normals I've had to deal with lately and I really needed a swift kick in the rear to get over it already.

Amrita said...

life is about changes and finding our new normal. Its about challenges.

The Lord gives us stability and a foothold.

Love to you

Lora said...

Oh the fellowship of suffering is so evident in the words and way you are sharing your heart Sheryl.

Blessings to you, abundant blessings, in your new normal.

Kim in NC said...

Thanks for being an example of someone walking in joy despite circumstances. Definitely something I need to work on doing!

Love ya', Sheryl

Vikki said...

AMEN! He loves us so much He desires us to have JOY in every part of our lives!!!!! but we have to make the choices that bring us joy. So wonderful to read your story, the good times and the hard times.

Susan said...

Normal/Joy Joy/Normal
hmmmmmm

something to contimplate for sure.
It is so important to find "Joy" in the things around us and in the people in our lives. It won't change a thing living depressed, irritated, wounded, or sad or even frusterated and mad. Won't change a thing! God revieled somthing to me about my husband yesterday. He is in a state of grummbling and irritation over a certain situation in our lives and made a comment to me that maid me feel bad for him. When I asked him what was eating at him he asked me "Do you ever just wish you could have your old life back? You know, go back to the way things were before....whatever?" How sad! I thought. Then God showed me that he had lost his "Joy" and that is why he grummbles and seems irritated all the time. We must find Joy! Choose Joy! God's word tells us to "Count it all joy" I told my husband, yoy better get over it buddy! cuz this IS your life!

Paula (SweetPea) said...

I dido what you say about not trading the pain for the blessings and closeness to Jesus such pain has brought. I do relate and understand that.

I quote God's word of never leaving nor forsaking us. Check it out...it's fairly short. I said, fairly.

lwayswright said...

I can so relate to your post! There really is never a "normal normal" it is, as you said, always changing. And change is often hard but in the end good!

His Girl said...

big deep sigh at the encouragement this post is filling me with right now.

Farmgirl Paints said...

It's a been a hard road for you. May God bring his mercy and grace and restore what was lost. I'm sure the new normal will be much less painful.

Alicia, The Snowflake said...

This has been a lesson I have had to learn over the last few years. My expectation of normal doesn't always fit God's desire for my life. Thank you for the reminder that we can have joy in the situation regardless. And again, thank you for always sharing your beautiful heart with us!

Yekaterina said...

wow...I just came across your blog, you are a very inspiring woman and mother, thank you!

Just a little something from Judy said...

Normal...what really is it?? It changes often for this family too. But, I am continuing to learn from you, appreciate you, and hurt with you. Someday, all of our normals will be beyond anything we can ever begin to imagine...without any tears. Keep pressing on dear friend!! Our prayers are with you!!

Pam said...

Amen sister! What's that saying, Normal is a setting on my dryer... (along with wash, rinse, spin, repeat!)

Beautiful Pear Tree Lane said...

Hi Sheryl,
Wonderful post, I am a firm believer that things we go through in life are first to grow us and make us stronger, second so we are able to help others as they are struggling with similar situations.
I know this... I have seen you grow through the struggles you have shared with us, and I hope and pray that I can grow with whatever comes my way.Thank you for sharing, as always you inspire me to grow.
Hugs,
Sue

care-in said...

I found you from Hisgirl. What a great post. It really spoke to me. Thank you for sharing.

Under the Florida Sun said...

Sheryl! What a great post! I loved this.
A dear friend of mine lost her little boy to an accident awhile back and we've talked about what used to be normal for them is now so different.. it's a new different normal.. but always open to changing.

Like gold refined, you are a beautiful person in God's design

2nd Cup of Coffee said...

Sheryl, this is my first time to visit you, and I'm so glad I found your blog. Your vulnerability and transparency are very touching.

I have a friend who deals with the same illness as you--not easy at all.

Your write about your trials in such a way that your joy--not happiness, but joy--come right through to the reader. What a great encouragement to others.

Anonymous said...

Oh so beautiful

ShEiLa said...

Wow!

I came to say congratulations for being a fellow winner at [Teresa's Treasures]. Excited to find out what it is we won.

The first thing that caught my eye is this adorable blog. Love the colors and layout and art and fonts. So daRliNg!

You have really been to hell and back... actually you still might be stuck in hell... I am so sorry. Not in a pitty kind of way... but you seem so sweet and I am a worrier and I care about people and their suffering.

I have almost decided that there is NO NORMAL... just the journey.
Even though I try to enjoy the journey and see joy in life... the trudging along is tough. Hang in there... Be assured that you have a friend in someone you have never met.

I am going to link you...
and I guess that will make me your newest follower.

Thanks for the insight.

ToOdLeS.

katemcdonald said...

Sheryl,

Thanks so much for leaving a comment on my blog..I know you probably undersand those feelings more than anyone else I "know". This blog resonated with me for the same reasons. Going through the loss of a marriage is...well...there's just no roadmap for that.

Its good to know I've got a sister who understands...blessings to you!

Sniffles and Smiles said...

Oh, I am so sorry...what a difficult journey it has been...I'm so glad you know the Lord...how would anyone ever get through such difficulties without Him? Congrats on your prize at Teresa's place! Glad she led me here...I've seen you around! And now had an excuse to visit your place! God bless you! ~Janine

Mimi's Toes said...

I found you thru Theresa's treasures blog giveaway. I won too. Congrats to you. I believe in the healing power of God. I will remember you in my prayers and I will be back to visit again soon.

Susan said...

Oh Sheryl,

What a blessing you are. Thanks for being such a TESTIMONY to the faithfulness of God.

You continually bless me and challenge me in my walk with the Lord.

Thanks for stopping by the other day.

Hope you have a blessed weekend.

Blessings♥

Lilly, Matt, and Sara said...

That is a great post! Being able to have joy in whatever circumstances is such a blessing from God! Congratulations on winning at Teresa's blog!

truth said...

It's funny what normal begins to mean when life keeps changing. By having a grandson with special needs, I've learned from parents of special kiddos, they don't like the term "normal" associated with children. "Typical" is our new normal.

So what happens when nothing is typical? LOL, we learn to know our Lord in a greater way.

Farmgirl Paints said...

Good Morning Sheryl,
I nominated you for an award on my blog today. I just love reading what you have to say. You are a ray of sunshine:) Have a great weekend.

Becky

Amrita said...

Don is like my younger BIL. Altho God saved my sister 's marriage and they are together, for the sake of the children Idon 't know what kind of relationship they have. My sis is an introvert, she doesn 't share.

I have found it hard to forgive my BIL