Grace

Update below:

Remember awhile back when I was telling you about my son, David. I even wrote a post about him and said "this is my son, in whom I am well pleased". Well, this morning, he is still my son but I am not well pleased! He went to camp this week as a counselor. His favorite place to be on earth. Not long ago I received a call from him that he is being sent home. Oh great!! For those of you who don't know what they are, this will sound a lot worse than it is, but he made an Axe bomb. (it's a guy's body spray and they duct tape the button down so that it continuously sprays and throw it into a girls cabin). Harmless, yes. Something they do every year, yes. Behavior fitting a counselor, no!

To say that I am disappointed is an understatement. I sit here waiting for him to get home wondering what my first words will be. Praying for widsom and divine parenting skills. Then the word "grace" keeps running through my mind. One of the definitions of grace is God's forgiving mercy. It is getting something you don't deserve. Is it punishment enough that he is having to leave his favorite place? That he has to say good bye to his campers before the camp is over? That many of his friends are there and they all will know? That he has to come home to me and face me? I don't know.

But I do know the grace and mercy that God bestows on me day after day. Minute after minute actually! It's a good thing every time I make an impulsive, stupid decision God doesn't let His wrath out on me. He does not turn His back on me. I need to come to Him and ask forgiveness and be repentant for my actions but He doesn't throw it up in my face. It is dealt with and over.

I am still well pleased with my son just not this decision. God is well pleased with us because He loves us and He knows we're human. We will make mistakes and some of them on purpose. This was no mistake on my son's part it was a choice he made and a bad one. Boy have I been there. I choose anger over self control, bitterness over forgiveness, selfishness over selflessness, envy over contentment, okay I think you get the point. I don't want to give all my secrets away! Yet, when God looks at me He still sees His son. He doesn't see the yuck. He extends grace and mercy.

Today I get to choose. May the words of my mouth and the mediation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord. (Psalm 19:14) Lord I pray for wisdom to parent well, for grace and mercy if they are to be extended. Get me out of the way. I know you are well pleased with David. I know I am well pleased with David. May he know that today. Don't let us waste this teachable moment. May I learn something from it as well.

Here's the update I know you all are dying for. Did I extend grace or wrath, a big hug or a kick in the pants, smile or frown, forgiveness or bitterness? You're on the edge of your seats, aren't you. Well first I want to thank you all for your kind words of encouragement and your prayers. I know this situation was not life threatening but it had the potential to be life-altering. I know that a parent's words and actions can speak life or death into their child. Okay, already....I extended grace!!!! I love my son, he knows it, he knows he made a very poor choice, he also knows that his mom does too. Being sent home from his favorite place on earth, indeed was punishment enough. Thanks for caring about David. (and aren't you so proud of me, ha!!)